Herbology & Potions

Wow!

2006-08-01T01:38:00.000+08:00

I just learned something! At 0130 hours!

Note; new link, leading to my LJ account. Shiny and new.

Feeling smug.

the Random Bantam strikes

2006-08-01T01:20:00.000+08:00

This seems to happen to me far too often. One in the morning; stuck at work for the next seven hours; finished my book; not sleepy yet! Darn! Phooey! Too much sugar and caffeine!!

On the other hand, I have spent an extremely productive three days. I have built a (short) wall, replaced the tap in the kitchen sink, learned the basics of silk painting, and recorded harp music for a short film clip. Also tried out making a new dessert when my Aunt came over for dinner (cherry clafouti- highly recommended).

Drat. I just know that everything will suddenly whir into bustle and activity in a couple of hours. By which time, I will have settled down enough to be tired.

BTW; for anyone interested, I have now set up a livejournal account. Not sure what to do with it.

I suppose that I could go and eat something?

fighting anorexia!

2006-07-16T00:20:00.000+08:00

I have found a most yummy recipe for custard. Can be made as thick as you like; either to pour over dessert, or fill pastries etc!

Put 1 cup milk in a saucepan with some vanilla flavouring (bean, essence, whatever...). Bring to the boil.
While that's happening, put three egg yolks, two tablespoons of cornfour and 1/3 cup caster sugar in a bowl. Beat till thick and creamy.
Add boiling milk to egg mix slowly. Continue to beat while you do so (unless you like lumpy custard).
Bung the lot back in the pot, and stir/ heat till it boils and thickens.

Most tasty. Kinda dangerous, too.

Plotting makes the world go round

2006-06-18T03:44:00.000+08:00

My goodness! haven't posted in months. And months. And then some.
Keeping alive my tradition of only posting while on night -shifts, I hereby choose to gloat at 3:45am.

I have something evil planned! Well, not evil, but should be fun to watch. Minor evil, really. Barely even registers. Nobody's going to complain, really. Or, if they do, I won't be listening. Stage one complete, stage two tomorrow...

Taking Auntie and her friend out to a rather nice lunch. Buffet even. Food will be from 11am til 2pm. Digesting will take the rest of the day! Mmmm, buffet.

And if there's anyone who doesn't know, I have taken up crochet. All I need now are grandchildren.

Incidentally, can anyone think of a good costume setup for Swancon? Me stumped, 'cos I refuse to be Buttercup. Or Wesley. Cursed as I am with a unusually sparse moustache, Inigo Montoya is out of the question.

people really do that?

2006-02-23T14:25:00.000+08:00

I just had to share these two websites

http://www.phobe.com/furby/
www.subservientchicken.com

the day the triffids died

2006-01-23T11:47:00.000+08:00

Alas!

Powdery mildew has struck my beautiful zucchini and squash! They have been cut down in their prime :(

Curse the warm, rainy weather! Fie upon the stupid cyclone system up the coast!

All hail the cupric oxide!

I wish that I wasn't stuck at work, when I could be working in my vege patch.

You'd think it was obvious, wouldn't you?

2006-01-05T14:38:00.000+08:00

Two fruit and five veg; what the doctor actually means

It is recommended that you, and your child each eat two serves of fruit and five serves of vegetables every day.
This appears to have given rise to some confusion. So; to clarify, see below

1)These serves are recommended per person. It is not the recommended serves per family. One apple divided between four people is not a serve of apple each; it is a taste.

2) When we say fruit, we mean the stuff that gets picked off an actual tree. If it comes in a wrapper, it is not a fruit. Fruit roll-ups are not fruit, in spite of the name. Fruit juice is not fruit, no matter how much of it you drink. Cordial isn’t even pretending to be fruit.

3)Children cannot eat what is not there. If there is no fruit in the house, they certainly won’t spend their pocket-money to get it. That means that you will have to buy sufficient fruit and vegetables for every person in the family, for every day of the week. If there are five people in the family, you need to have ten serves of fruit, and 25 serves of vegetables available every day.

4) In order to gain the benefit of eating fruit and vegetables, it necessary to eat them. Buying them is not sufficient. Nor is considering eating them, no matter how hard you think about it. If the organic matter does not pass your lips, then it doesn’t count. Keep in mind that your child may not actually eat everything that you place in their lunch-box. The bin is easy to find in every school.

5) It is pointless to try to convince one person in the family to eat something, when no-one else has to. Or in other words, if one child has constipation and needs to expand their fibre intake, then you should make everyone else follow the same schedule. Hard feelings will ensue. This is better than constipation or lactulose, however.

6) There has been some confusion as to what constitutes a "serve". A serve of fruit is approximately the amount that you can fit in your hand. One grape is not the same as one apple. Nor is a rockmelon.

7) We recommend these amounts of fruit and vegetables in order to supply adequate nutrients and fibre in your diet. It cannot be substituted by tablets. We can use medications to force your body to behave itself, but it is so much better to just eat the fruit. Fruit also costs less. Keep in mind that some people need more fibre than others. That means that one of your children may need more fruit than the others to remain healthy.

8) Some fruit and veg is better than no fruit and veg. Keep trying.

Possible T-shirt designs

2005-12-30T13:05:00.000+08:00

Inspired by Emma at work. Kudos where it is due!

"333 - Only Half Evil"

"Cleverly disguised as a Responsible Adult" (Ideal for my job!)

"My other body is thinner"

"Master of Disaster"

"I see dumb people" (When would we take it off?)

"Goth Inside"

"Friends don't let friends have mullets"

These are in order of how much I like them.

If you're confused and upset, the first rule is to spread it around

2005-11-25T00:02:00.000+08:00

My word.

I just had a child make a very concerted effort to die. Twenty minutes of seizure that we couldn't stop. No IV access. No flipping veins, either.
Well, he's in ICU now! That's certainly one way to get a new bed.

Gnnn!

I then had the task of waking up my consultant and bringing him up to date with events. Whoever said that medicine didn't have it's moments?

A discovery of the day; the more worried I am in a medical situation, the calmer and more deliberate my voice gets. If you ever hear me say, "Could you please call a MET for me?", or "Would you be so kind as to get the crash trolley?", then you should get scared. The more so if I seem to be enunciating unusually clearly. When relaxed, I tend to joke around with a broad 'Straylian' accent.

My second new tidbit of information; did you know that horses can't vomit? I didn't.

Well! Thank God for that!

2005-10-29T12:31:00.000+08:00

He said yes. Whew! It only took a minimal amount of ethanol and arm wrestling to get the right answer, too! I think I'd have burst into tears if he hadn't.
Now I just have to tell everyone. Consider this a community announcement!
Yay!

I feel twitchy. Oh so twitchy...

2005-10-28T08:00:00.000+08:00

Right. Romantic dinner. Hotel room booked. Ring, check. Work advised to stay quiet for the evening.
Boyfriend getting suspicious. Kept me up last night, trying to find out just what I'm plotting.
Damn! He'd better say yes after all this. If he doesn't, I'll be staying at the hotel anyway!
Didn't sleep well last night.

Coincidentally, anyone see Dominic Deegan today? New twist to the tale.

it's all squared away

2005-10-12T21:01:00.001+08:00

Hee hee! I have lattice! It just happened in the space of one day; I went out to work from a normal house. I came back to one covered in lots of little squares. When I first saw it, I thought that I had made a terrible (and expensive) mistake. Then I had something to eat, and took a second look. Looks great! Somehow makes the house look a little bit like the setting for an English cottage garden! Not the original intention, but a nice side effect!

I also have absolutely no lawn. It is gone; the lawn is dead; long live the lawn. In its place, there is dirt. Well, actually, there is dirty sand, but from a distance, it's hard to tell the difference. There's a great big heap of new sandy stuff, too. I managed to dig about a quarter of it already this afternoon when I got home from work.

The garden is happening! Excitement!

If anyone catches me buying gnomes, please have me disposed of humanely.

...and counting

2005-10-05T12:32:00.000+08:00

nine days to holiday. nine days to holiday. nine days to holiday.
NB; I need to start getting people's snailmail addresses
nine days and counting down.

it's only paranoia if they're not out to get you

2005-09-19T22:19:00.000+08:00

Guh!

I am reduced to monosyllabilism by today.
Too much work.

It was such a nice day too; until switchboard figured out that my pager wasn't working! Then it all splatted. Oh well. Home in an hour. Difficult to accidentally kill anyone in that time period. Deliberately, now...

I get to hire a bobcat this weekend. This is going to be fun! I wonder if they'll let me drive it. An interesting point; if the professionals do the job, it should take a couple of hours to get rid of my lawn. If I try, (never having touched a bobcat in my life), the time period becomes poorly defined. Possibly a new definition of infinity.

So! Asphodel! Did you like 'Howl's Moving Castle' as written by Dianne Wynne Jones?

3 HP links

2005-09-06T18:34:00.000+08:00

The Ten Commandments of Fandom
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Poet, or I had not thought Death Eaters had undone so many.
and
Severus, the Shakespearean Slytherin, Part One and Part Two

Enjoy!

Howl's Moving Castle (part deux)

2005-08-26T17:55:00.000+08:00

Okay, time's been moved:

Howl's Moving Castle
Date: Saturday 10th September
Time: 3pm
Venue: FTI Fremantle (92 Adelaide St)
Price $10 (Children under 8 $5)

Any better?

newsflash

2005-08-25T18:17:00.000+08:00

Important item! I've been promoted! I have a position as a registrar! No more will I be a lowly minion. No!!! From January of next year, I shall be a middling minion!!! (I feel that I have come a very long way from my beginnings as very lowly minion - aka intern). I was in the middle of the ED when I got the news. Unable to utter profanities, I had to settle for squeaking and doing the happy hamster dance around the floor.
I swear, one day someone's going to get a photo of that.
I have also been offered a registrar possy for the next two weeks, as a reliever. This should be entertaining. Will post bulletins as events warrant.

Howl's Moving Castle Advance Screening

2005-08-23T19:33:00.000+08:00

Okay!

Howl's Moving Castle
Date: Thursday 1st September
Time: 7.30pm
Venue: FTI Fremantle (92 Adelaide St)
Price $10

Who wants to go?

Tee-hee!

2005-08-22T17:33:00.000+08:00

Short ficlet, Usual disclaimer: I don't own the characters but it's no use suing me because while JK Rowling has money, I have none.

An Exercise in Concentration

by Asphodel

MacGonnagall's voice rang out strongly over the classroom. “Now, let it be understood that in transfiguration, concentration is of the utmost importance. With non-verbal spell casting, it must become imperative. Although each spell is designed to perform a particular act, the shape and form of the transfigured object is ultimately taken from the mind of the user. When spoken aloud, the familiarity of the words guide the mental conceptualisation. Without them.... Well, we shall see how well you do.”

A leather wrapped block of wood was slapped down in front of each of them. “The basic spell should be a familiar one to all of you. Clear your mind of all distractions. Focus on the one spell you wish to take effect.”

After fifteen minutes, most of the class was red faced with the effort of not speaking the spell aloud. Lavender had obviously given up and was making moonstruck faces at Ron instead of her book-to-be, while Hermione's brows were beetled with concentration.

A sudden clatter from Ron's desk drew everyone's attention. Where previously a block of wood had sat, there was now a large paperback with a tan cover. Ron looked at his achievement with more disbelief than all of his classmates combined.

MacGonnagall's long hand swooped down and picked it up. A raised eyebrow was her only response as she turned it over. “The 'Joy of Sex' Mister Weasely? Not exactly the defined subject of this lesson. What exactly were you thinking of?” Ron blushed bright red and the rest of the class goggled. She shook her head. “Never mind. I believe I know.” A quick wand gesture returned the book to its original state. “Ten points to Griffindor for being the first to achieve the set object, and five from Grifindor for inappropriate subject matter.”

From where she sat, Hermione was the only one positioned to see MacGonnagall's quick wink as she swept back up to her desk. Unfortunately, she was still gaping at Ron.

So Beautiful...

2005-08-21T21:51:00.000+08:00

Check these out.

HBP Postcards

New Recipe

2005-08-11T19:04:00.000+08:00

I just tried out a new way of cooking fish. The end result does not taste of fish at all, which is a very important consideration for me (I don't actually like the taste of fish very much, normally). It also seems kinda easy, considering! Here it is;

(For two people)
-two fillets of a white fish
-one stalk of lemon grass
-chilli
-coriander (enough to cover your hand)
-garlic
-ginger
-spring onion (two stalks are enough)
-lime
-peanut oil (vegetable oil will do)

Get a stalk of lemon grass, split it in half and trim to the length of your fish fillets. Put each bit of lemon grass onto a largish bit of tin-foil.

Put a fillet of fish onto each piece of foil.

Onto the fish put a heap of herbs; coriander (cut up a bit), squashed garlic (one clove per fillet), chilli, grated ginger, spring onion (thinly sliced). Put some lime slices on top of that.

Drizzle on a bit of peanut oil (or vege. oil).

Close the foil

Cook at 180C for 15 minutes.

Remove the lemon grass. Serve with rice and whatever.

Vaguely Thai in flavour. Very yummy, and pretty quick to cook if you're hungry, and just happen to have all those ingredients in the fridge!

"I hate my subconscious. It's like it has a mind of it's own." -- Alexi Sayle

2005-08-05T16:31:00.000+08:00

Okie-dokie, new ficlet posted over at Flying High On the Ground. HP based but set far in the future. It's not posted here because it's mild slash (implied only, with no sex at all) but out of consideration for all the delicate souls out there I thought I'd better post it on the page with disclaimers that you just can't miss.

Victory!

2005-07-25T13:40:00.000+08:00

Case dismissed! And Dad gets to pay our costs. Heh heh heh...

He didn't even bother turning up; they'd filed some new papers two days before, and it was assumed that our barrister would ask for an adjournment. Meanwhile, our barrister assumed that they were going to ask for time... so in the end no-one did. Case went ahead as booked, and the judge decided that there was no case no be answered.

And, as I said, Dad gets to pay for a day in court, two barristers and two solicitors. That's at least twenty thousand dollars; more likely forty thousand.

*Pax does happy hamster dance*

Do I need to add that he's already filed another claim? Honestly; if you hand some people a bit of wood, they'll club hemselves to death. It's a little bit embarrassing to admit that we're related at times.

Hee hee hee!

meeep...

2005-07-23T14:53:00.000+08:00

I don't think that I have a very good week coming up.

Over the weekend I am working. Could be worse.

On Monday, I go to court against my Dad. Yay; not. If we win, he'll appeal. If he wins, we'll appeal. Winners = lawyers.

On Tuesday, I have to take my cat to the vet for a check-up. Always good for a laugh, when one does not possess a cat-carrier, but does posses a cat who hates cars. Then I go to work.

Wed. through to Friday, I have work again.

Still no heating.

I can't believe that I have voluntarily swapped a shift of work in order to go and have a fight with my Dad!

I can believe that I have had better weeks doing exams. If anyone feels like plying me with chocolate, it will be very welcome. Pax not happy. Mildly glum, and vaguely belligerent towards older males.

Tuesday is a good day for chocolate (hint, hint)

tweedle eedle doo

2005-07-18T22:05:00.000+08:00

I wish that it was
So it were that I could
In the world outside of my head
Change all of my life
In the blink of an eye
The wave of a hand
To never say die
And merrily frolic ahead

I wish it were so
That I would if I could
Forever instead of one day
Remember tomorrow
Before I forget
The pattern of wishing
For what I regret
That memories are made up today

Half Blood Prince

2005-07-16T22:59:00.000+08:00

Arrghhhhhh!!!

The book is much better written than I expected. No unnecessary drivel, fast paced, keeps the attention, all that. But the ENDING!!! AAAAAA!!!

I am incoherent. Cannot speak without making furious squeeky noises. Will now shut up and go eat ice cream. To mis-quote BMB "there is nothing that cannot be solved by frozen creamy goodness." I can only hope they're right. *sob*

Half Blood Prince

2005-07-16T14:48:00.000+08:00

Wow! Just finished reading HBP. Scary, in that some of this stuff I predicted. I'd better not say what, though, or Asphodel might just kill me. Consider me bug-eyed. Happy, but bug-eyed, slack-jawed, AND I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!!!!!
Dammit, JKR isn't going to update for years!
Waaaaah!
Hmmm. Some shippers are going to be happy, others are going to be devastated. Or not. I have noticed that people tend to bounce well in this genre.

FUN!!!

2005-07-13T21:26:00.000+08:00

Wow! I just had a nice day!
It started out with a lovely long lie-in. Didn't get out of bed till at least 8:30 : )
Then I gloated over some beautiful ribbons that I bought yesterday from a shop that Asphodel showed me. Mmmm, colours...
Then I paid my bills :(
Then I got home again, and found a big box waiting for me. I love getting big boxes on the doorstep- it's a hangover from childhood, I think. And this one was filled with plants that I ordered a few months ago! Yay! Solidago! And Soloman's seal! Also clematis, bromeliads, hostas, begonias, tigridia bulbs, cannas, lilly of the valley...
Happy happy me!
Then Ken arrived for a practice- he's in a competition on the weekend, and I'm playing the whistle for his bodhran pieces. All went well, and it was back to gardening!
Day has now ended with dinner at my cousin's place; where there is heating. Heating is a good thing at the moment. I don't have any. I need heating.
And I have my CV ready to hand in for next year.
And Harry Potter HBP comes out in three sleeps.
*happy*

Of course, the large amounts of sugar consumed today has absolutely nothing to do with my good mood. (Yeah, right)

Dead doc walking

2005-07-09T13:09:00.000+08:00

Well, they got me at last. I am sick.

*cough cough*

Don't worry; I was a lot worse a few days ago. Point in fact, a few days ago I was not well enough to write a post to say that I was ill...

And you should never walk around a hospital if you're an unwell member of the staff- you get a strange kind of sympathy. I've had offers of X-rays, adrenaline nasal drops and a PNA (snot test to see what bug I've got); but no-one's suggested a cup of tea.

On the other hand, myself on demazin is a funy sight to see. Somewhat reminiscent of mersyndol effect, for those of you who remember that. Never mind. The babies are young enough not to remember the strange doctor. Free entertainment is not to be sneezed at.

I'm at work. And I have about thirty discharge summaries to do. I don't WANT to write discharge summaries! They're boring!

*sigh*

Fine. I'll go do some paperwork. See ya all later!

Bah! Humbug!

FISH!!!

2005-06-17T09:28:00.000+08:00

I have FISH!
Little gold- FISH!
Lots of little FISH in a great big jar!

I have FISH!
Teeny- tiny FISH!
Five little FISH and some itty-bitty snails!

I also have sugar : )

Sympathy

2005-06-12T16:56:00.000+08:00

Asphodel, I just read your post on your blog. I'm sorry : ( If you were here, I'd be around with chocolate and distractions. As it is, consider yourself hugged. Could you pass on my regards to your Mum? I don't really know her well enough to intrude at this point, I think.

blah

2005-06-07T20:43:00.000+08:00

It is very wet! I don't like rain! Gah!

Which is ironic, seeing as I spent last weekend installing my pot-based water feature. Water lilies are in place; fish on Wednesday.

No news to report. Life boring. Want summer weather back. Or next HP book; whichever I can get the easiest. Chocolate is an acceptable substitute.

Oh! One bit of news; I have bought new harp strings. Quite painfully expensive, but well worth the investment. I have evicted the growing number of guitar strings that had been installed as stop-gap measures over the years. Have you ever seen a cat try to attack a guitar string? It kept tickling Kitten when she was trying to subdue it.

I am bored! Is anyone not amazingly busy? I have to catch up with people, 'ere I forget everybody's names (including mine own).

post-it sticky note from work

2005-05-27T19:17:00.000+08:00

Yep- the anticipated plague has struck@ the hospital! Luckily for me, it hit whilst I was off shift. So, although there be many kiddiwinks around, I wasn't the one who admitted them.
I also feel vaguely smug; kind of the feeling one has when you avoid disaster by a hair's breadth, but only learn how close it was after. (Dunno if that sentence made sense). A boy came to the ED with a strange presentation at three in the morning. Stuff didn't quite add up, so I decided to admit, and let a more awake person see him in the morning. As it happened, the day staff were a bit stumped, too. Until yesterday, when the clever orthopaedic surgeons took him to theatre and washed pus out of his hip! Gosh, am I glad that I admitted him! I was so close to telling his parents that he was having them on.
On another note, the pots have been delivered. I have bromeliads. Yay! No fish for a week, though.
Off to do some random doctoring.
Tum-te-tum!

water feature!

2005-05-24T17:23:00.000+08:00

I just had a wicked idea! Totally unrelated to any fic, but what the hell. I have always wanted a water feature in my garden, but I couldn't see any way of doing it. 'Til now!

I am going to find a really big pot, block off the drainage hole, coat the inside, and fill it with water and plants! In a week or two, I can get fish! Yay!

Now I just have to figure out where it can go. And find a big pot. But in theory, I can have a water garden!

In case it's not obvious, I am trying to avoid doing paper-work : )

Miss you, Ashphodel! Hope you are having fun, and that the flight was OK. Say hi to the man for me! (BTW, what should I call him in blogger-space?)

not dead yet

2005-05-19T19:29:00.000+08:00

Hmmm. I live under a rock, don't I? Take my word for it; I am alive. Haven't had time to die yet.

I have been cooking up a rant for several weeks now. So hear it is!

The basic summary is that anorexic patients are really silly. And at that I'm being very nice. It is very hard to feel otherwise, especially when you are working in a kids' hospital. Under our team we had babies after open heart surgery, children waiting for liver transplants, others who needed to be fed by a drip, two cases of child abuse who's nearest and dearest lacerated their liver and pancreas by trying to break them over their knee. And these stupid girls, standing next to their beds (uses more calories, dearies), who pouted at us, saying, "but I don't want to eat. You bastards, you don't understand!" and throwing hissy fits when their nasogastric feeds got increased. They honestly thought that we'd never heard of water loading or weights. They outright denied having purged, even when we had the blood tests proving it, and someone had heard them throwing up in the toilet.

Now don't get me wrong; there are a few basic types of anorexics. The first, and simplest, is the young anorexic, who has found their body changing, and doesn't like it. For various reasons, they don't want to grow up, and take steps to avoid it. Some have issues with weight gain, having been told from an early age that it's terrible to gain five kilos. Others find that they can't cope with the idea of puberty...etc etc. The over-riding characteristic is fear, and if they receive help with that, they can find it in themselves to cope with the rest. Which is not to trivialise them, or make out that it's easy for them; but they are understandable, and they have my sympathy.

The next category that I've mentally defined are those with a predisposing mental illness. Normally, it will be an element of obsessive compulsive disorder, or of depression. In these kids, the anorexia is an expression of the disease, rather than being the primary problem. After all, we don't describe excessive handwashing as an ilness seperate from OCD. Classically, the child with OCD is trying to impose some kind of order on teir surroundings. Often it is the case that they are unable to control anything at all (often a result of family conditions, but by no means exclusively so). If your own body is the only thing you have any control over, and then it starts doing stuff without your say-so, you tens to over-react, and fail to take it in context. They forget that gaining weight is what a teenager's body does, just as are periods, body hair ad all the other joys of life. And so they control it. Again, the solution is deceptively simple. Treat the mental illness, treat the anorexia. Easy to say!

A subgroup of the above are those kids who have no control at all. Again, the only thing they have any say in is how much they eat and exercise. What they lose is a measure of how "good" they are at it, and so it goes. These guys make my blood boil; usually because I'm on their side! Classic case scenario; child abuse where the mother will not belive that the father (or other figure) is doing anything. Worse again, they may know, but refuse to acknowledge that there is anything they should do about it; or even that it is wrong! When the abuse in on the part of the maternal figure, it is often more subtle. It can take the form of constant put-downs (often about weight), monetary restrictions, deliberately being nasty in front of friends, obstructing the child's ability to make friends in the first place, not buying clothing of an appropriate nature (some parents will even deliberately dress their kid in far too an adult an suggestive manner), or not buying clothing at all. Basically treating their own child as a rival, rather than a responsibilty or loved one.

All of the above I can handle. The anorexic is not the one in control of the situation, and usually does not want to be sick. Unfortunately, there is another category; the personality disorder types.

Now, I have issues with borderline personality individuals at the best of times. For those who have never had to learn the term, they can be best summed up as nasty bastards/ bitches. Think Melrose Place personalities. Everything is about them, everyone must love them, attention must be theirs at all times. There is no sense of proportion, no empathy for the feelings of others, no true conscience about their actions as far as I've ever abserved. These are the women who will cut themselves up and take overdoses, to make someone feel bad about a slight (real or imagined). The man who will shoot their partner's kids to get back at them for breaking up with them. You hear about them on the news all the time. And these are the ones who cotton on to anorexia as a means to obtain almost unlimited support, attention, medical care etc. They will happily use it to upset their families, scare friends, guilt boyfriends and so on. And, just like the ones who take a packet of pills every time they want to punish someone, they will eventually get it wrong. They will miscalculate and not be found in time, push their potassium too low with a resulting cardiac arrest, or dehydrate themselves to renal failure. The possibilities are there. They do a lot of damage before they go, and many seem to exist only to make other's lives harder. In a ward with other anorexic patients, they can do irreparable harm; by telling the younger ones that they are doing the right thing, encouraging them to fight treatment, belittling the staff, mocking those who are putting on weight by themselves, telling those of their own age that they are getting fat... And all to make themselves important. I regard them as a waste of time. They are not going to get better. They are small minded, mean spirited individuals, with a nasty streak of narcissism and no brakes on their behaviour. That they should take a long, hard look at themselves never crosses their mind. The medical profession can not cure a personality; it's a part of the person. The best that we can offer is to try to stop them doing severe harm; and we're not very good at that, even.

Long live Darwinian selection. I have failed to bring the others of my team to the idea that such patients just be allowed to off themselves as quickly as possible. Apparently, there is this thing called the Hippocratic oath. Primum non nocere, et al. But I am left a more cynical individual as a consequence of their antics.

Twits

Sorry, I just needed to get that off of my chest.

As a side comment, there are quite a few Harry Potter fan-fics where Harry develops anorexia nervosa. Let the record state that I consider this highly unlikely. If he were OCD, we would have noticed by now (his homework might be better, for a start!). Our man tends to externalise his feelings of anger, and blow up at friends/ enemies etc. On occasion, he has blown up relations, full stop. I suspect that rather than develop full flown, major depression as described in the texts, Harry is more likely to become a very angry chappie for a while. Possibly, it will act as the impetus for his fight against Voldemort. On a more cynical note, I reckon that there's not enough time for him to develop major depression and restriction of caloric intake before the end of the series. He is abused, granted. As matters stand, however, the level of abuse has been decreasing. For this to be a trigger would necessitate a major escalation in mistreatment, as well as a more passive character; a paradigm shift in his dealings with the outside world.

Do I need to add that I don't read these fics? Correction; I've read a couple, mainly to see what the popular impression of anorexia is. It is inaccurate.

'Nuff said! End of rant. Deep breath.

This is why I have such low therapy bills!

I promise that I am working on a fic at the moment. It is just hiding somewhere behind my amygdala. I don't want to scare it into the cerebellar tonsils, so I'm being very patient with it.

Tootle- ooh!

We keep you alive to serve this computer. Code well and live.

2005-04-18T09:17:00.000+08:00

I've been a slave to my computer for the last two days. It has not been an enjoyable experience.

I've fallen into a very strange sleep pattern, going to bed when the sun rises and waking up past noon. It came to a head yesterday afternoon when Pax came over to take me to a movie and found me in bed asleep with a headache. She very kindly patted me on the head and pointed out that if I went out with her, I'd fall asleep during the movie we'd planned to see. Thank you very much for your forbearance!

Thanks to the kindly house call, I managed to catch another couple of hours sleep during the day but couldn't catch a wink all night. However, I have been making good use of my time (maybe) and have finally finished my Animé Music Video. Unfortunately, I can't figure out how to post it, link it, or in any other way display it. If some one who actually knows a darn thing about this computer business can give me a hand, I might be able to get it up at some point. Otherwise, unless some people feel like getting some massive fecking e-mails, my questionable brilliance will remain hidden. *grin*

I've discovered that it takes me about an hour to write a one and a quarter page blog post, four hours to write fanfiction of equivalent length, and it took me two and a half hours to create a four and a half minute music video. I can see a law of exponential increase occurring here...

Oh well. At least I'll have something to show at slash con! Not sure how slashy it is though. Hard to achieve when you're working with Fruit's Basket and all the people are anti-hug because they turn into animals when they embrace a member of the opposite sex... Obviously, the ideal solution is to fall in love with someone of the same gender, unless your sexual preferences happen to run that way, of course!

And no, I did not use Shigure and Ayame as my pairing! They're far to easy!

I'm still alive, thank you very much.

2005-04-02T20:10:00.000+08:00

I can't believe that I didn't tell you I've started a live journal for my slash writing. I think I've told everyone else twice already! Click the above link to read my debut piece. Anyone feel like being my beta???

A poem of warning

2005-03-09T09:25:00.000+08:00

A little poetry to decribe some of my evening last night.

Stupidity's contagious
You can catch it like the 'flu
Talk too long to someone dumb
And you'll look stupid too

It really is surprising
Just how fast the change can be
This I say, 'cos yesterday
The curse occurred to me

While minding my own business
(As much as Docs can do)
A lass came by, and she said "Hi"
And I said "How are you?"

A conservation started
As we waited for the lift
But it was clear, that this poor dear
Had not a mental gift

Her simple mind was occupied
With everyday inanity
And little me, no place to flee
Was verging on insanity

The lift did come, and I escaped
Oh happy day indeed!
But bugger it, the silly chit
Has marked me with her rede

From that point on, throughout the night
And all that night to come
I could not gape my mouth to spake
Without my sounding dumb

Entertaining it may be
For other folk to giggle
But if you wish my fate to miss
This warning saves your wriggle

If someone starts to talk to you
Who's obviously a twit
Do not stay; just walk away
You'll get away with it

ATTENTION! I have a question for.... well, everyone that's interested, I guess...

2005-02-27T16:46:00.000+08:00

Who wants to go see Constantine this coming Sunday? It's the 6th of March.

thank you, thank you!

2005-02-15T14:05:00.000+08:00

*round of applause for me!* It was my birthday! *bows all round*

Thank you to everyone who sent me their kind wishes, you are all wonderful people. *hugs & kisses*

And now a short vignette in response to mandragora's lovely birthday present!

A Deal is a Deal

by Asphodel

Hidden as best as he could manage behind the purple and gold drapes on the window sofa, Snape sat in Dumbledore's office and glared impartially at the garish décor. Why in Merlin's name, he mused, did one of the most powerful wizards of the age confine himself to this role of a slightly dotty headmaster when he could have claimed the recognition and accolades that were his due? Never putting himself forward to take the credit, always the deus ex machina, hidden within plain sight, Snape knew that he himself would never be able to achieve the same social success, however well he had learnt his lessons.

Years of applying the same techniques in a very different environment had produced a camouflage that was so far removed from Dumbledore's it would never have been suspected that they were master and student. Where Dumbledore blended into the light, Snape had lived in the dark. Transplanted into each other's domains they stood out like sore thumbs. However, the least the Headmaster would have risked in the Dark Lord's... Voldemort's circle was torture and death, while all Snape risked in the ministry was imprisonment and hideous embarrassment. Somehow, the thought did not comfort him.

Where was the blasted man?! Bad enough to be sent away like a child awaiting detention but...

As the door latch snapped open to admit Dumbledore, Snape half-rose from the sofa, his wand pointed instinctively at the sound. Affecting not to notice, the headmaster strode around the desk to drop wearily into his chair before looking up into Snape's eyes. “That is quite unnecessary, Severus. Do sit down. You're not in trouble, or at least, no more than you usually are.”

The blue eyes twinkled as Snape twitched, knowing his old teacher had picked up the stray thoughts associating previous detention sessions with his current predicament. However, he refused to allow Dumbledore to read any more into his behaviour than absolutely necessary. He sank back into his previous position and composed himself. “Did you convince Fudge?” he asked in an disinterested tone of voice that he barely recognised as his own.

The twinkle died at the re-introduction of a serious topic. “There were some small wrinkles, not the least of which was my, previous, absolute silence on the existence of a spy, but the ministry has agreed to seal your record and grant you amnesty for the... hmm... actions that were committed due to the necessity of your... position.”

The tension in Snape's shoulders hummed a little more tightly. “There were valid reasons for your reluctance to admit to the source of your information, Albus. A powerful occlumens surrounded by generations of protective wards is a much more ambitious target than a single traitorous Death Eater. As for the latter... Let us call a spade a spade. My potions were used to kill people. We both know the Ministry would not have let that slide so easily, especially with their doubts about my membership in the Order. What are you hiding, Albus?” Snape's voice had dropped with every word until the last question was a hiss that would have done his house's namesake proud. With it, came a spear thrust of mental force determined to win the answer to his question from the mind of his teacher.

Unexpectedly, the Headmaster's mind opened just before Snape breached his shields, allowing the younger man full access to Dumbledore's memories of the last day or so before he was gently but forcibly tossed out on his figurative ear.

“You what?!” For the second time in under ten minutes, Snape leapt to his feet. “How could you? Of all the ridiculous things to suggest! When I'm not even...! After all I've done...!”

“Severus, it is because of all you have done.” Although Snape loomed over him, the headmaster still managed to retain his stern look. “Although it was done, and done well, in the name of light, the harm you've caused to innocents must be balanced.” The twinkle returned. “And what better way to restore your karma than to teach the lessons you've learnt to the children of those you've wounded?”

Deflated, Snape fell back into the sofa as wearily as Dumbledore had dropped into his chair earlier. He bent forward until his hair hid his face and he was murmuring to his knees. “That, and you're the only one the Moody trusts to keep an eye on me. As ever, Albus, I am at your command. After all, where else would I go?”

Happy Birthday Ashphodel!

2005-02-11T01:32:00.000+08:00

Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday, dear Ashphodel!
Happy birthday to you!

Here is the promised tale! It begs a sequel, which I am playing with in my mind. I hope that it was worth the wait : )

"New Staff"

Disclaimer: not my people, alas. I lack the bank balance!
No warnings required

There was a notable air of bonhomie prevalent that evening. Minerva McGonagall was safely ensconced in her favourite chair with a glass in her hand; water, alas. Ethanol and staff meetings did not mix well. With a bare three weeks remaining before the start of the new school year, a significant amount of housekeeping remained to be done.

A third of the staff members were new; their predecessors either missing, dead, or retired. The student body was similarly depleted, and the child who had not lost a family member to the recent war was a rarity. Everyone’s nerves were still on edge. And these issues came on top of the normal difficulties involved in the running of a school! Small mercies though; this year, at least, would not be starting with a roll-call of the dead.

I still can’t believe it, she thought. It’s too good to be true…

She let her mind drift, as the other professors gathered to chat. Already, the last few years were taking on a dreamlike aspect. Minerva snorted. No doubt one day Professor McGonagall would be telling her war stories, embroidered lavishly, to children as yet unborn. And no matter how embellished they got, she would always be prepared to swear that they were the unvarnished truth. The privileges of advancing age! She had already overheard tales which beggared belief. Most of these were the usual self-aggrandisement. But a few of the more creative dealt with the topic of The Boy Who Lived. If she payed attention to gossip, the child was everything from a natural sorcerer to a profound squib. All eye-witness accounts, of course. Much though she despised herself for it, Minerva had begun to think that Albus had a valid point regarding young Mr Potter’s placement. No matter how remote the household, there was no way that Harry could have failed to get a swelled head from the attention payed to him.

Still, that was an issue for the future. Of rather more immediate concern was one Albus Dumbledore. However much he might try to conceal it, she had noted a disquieting twinkle in his eyes for the last week. For the life of her, she couldn’t figure out why; but given past form, it would be something shocking. She didn’t trust that old codger not to get up to mischief when her back was turned. She snorted. Forget You Know Who in a rage; Dumbledore with a secret was the truly frightening one.

As if the thought had conjured him (not impossible), the door to the staff room swung open to admit the most powerful wizard of the age. White haired, grandfatherly, a benevolent figure beloved of most of the wizarding community. Maroon robes today, she noted. As always, a sense of confidence, of comfort filled Minerva’s being, and an automatic smile of greeting graced her face. Standing to greet him, she hesitated, seeing that someone had accompanied him into the room.

Tall, thin, black hair and dark expression. She recognised him, of course. Having taught him for seven years, she felt that she knew as much as was necessary about the man. One of the more antisocial students, if her memory served, who held himself aloof as much from a stubborn sense of dignity as anything else. What she didn’t know was why he was here, of all places. Now, what was his name again?

“Ah, Minerva”, said Albus. “And how are you tonight? I must confess, I have found the weather to be quite oppressively warm in the last few days”. His voice dropped to a confidential whisper. “Between you and me, I fear that I may have to leave off one of my vests if this keeps up”.

Apparently failing to notice her pointed curiosity, he turned to the rest of the room with every evidence of pleasure. “Welcome all! It is very good of you to give up your precious free time in order to sit in this stuffy room. Before we get going, there is one announcement in order. As you know, there has been some slight difficulty procuring a suitable teacher for potions since the unfortunate demise of the last incumbent.” Dumbledore paused, looking downcast for a moment. “Fortunately, the situation has been remedied. I believe that most of you already know Professor Severus Snape? Well, it is my pleasure to announce that he has consented to be our potions instructor for the next year. We can only hope that he may be persuaded to remain for longer than that, of course!”

A stunned silence greeted his words. It was broken after a few seconds by a squeaking noise from the new charms teacher. Flitwick, wasn't it? As if that broke a spell, the room erupted into mutters, and scandalised whispers. Minerva saw “Professor” Snape’s expression harden.

“While I anticipate that there may be some opposition to his appointment”, Albus continued blithely, “I hope it goes without saying that I expect the teachers at Hogwarts to be united against the… ahem, in front of the students.”

When the background muttering continued, he sighed and asked, “Is anything the matter?”

Overcoming her own shock, Minerva found her voice. “You cannot be serious, Albus? There are certain prerequisites for being a professor at this school! Do I really need to remind you of that?”

Flitwick opened his mouth as if to speak, but she ignored him, focussing instead on the headmaster.

“And one of them is surely that the teacher must be older than the students! You forget, I taught him! The boy is barely into his twenties; there is no way he could be qualified to teach. Especially in such a field as potions or alchemy. To obtain a Masters alone takes…” She struggled to remember.

“Six years” A strained voice interrupted. “I had already started my studies when I left school”. For some reason, Snape was looking mildly aghast.

She regarded him with bemusement. “So you already have Mastery, then. Well, I suppose that’s something at least. Never-the-less, I don’t think that this could be considered an ideal first job, by anybody’s standards. Half of the students are too full of hormones to pay any attention in class, and the other half are too feckless to care”. Privately, Minerva was impressed; potions masters were usually in their forties before they completed their studies. She continued “You’d be taking your life in your hands every time you set foot in that classroom. Is that what you want?”

This time, it was Albus who stepped once more into the fray. “I feel it my duty to mention that this is not exactly young Severus’ first episode of employment. Until now, he has been involved in, ah, potions manufacture and development. Some work he has recently undertaken for me personally has not been without risk, either”. He coughed, looking bashful. “To be honest, I had not foreseen that his age would even be considered an issue”.

“But he has no experience with teaching at all”, she pointed out. “How could he be expected to control a room full of teenagers?”.

She heard a murmured comment from behind her. “Do you think she even glances at the papers..?”

Half-turning, Minerva addressed the room behind her. “I take it that you are referring to that nonsense about his being a Death Eater? I doubt very much that the headmaster would introduce a dark wizard into the heart of Hogwarts. Mind you”, she said thoughtfully, “it could be a very handy thing for the students to think. If they honestly believed there was a decent chance of their being poisoned for their transgressions, perhaps they might behave for him”. She thought for another second, and added “Or at least, be a little more discreet”.

“Tell me, Minerva”, asked Dumbledore, “what would you say if you thought that he really had been a Death Eater?”

“That would only go to prove my point! If he had been so impressionable as to have gotten involved with that lot, he’d need someone to keep an eye on him for the first few weeks, at least”. Folding her hands primly, she added, “You Know Who was not exactly noted for requiring syllabus schedules of his followers, now, was he? Running around in a mask is about as far as you could hope to get from real life. I doubt the boy even knows what a lesson plan looks like!”

“I see. Do you know, I think that you may have an idea there, Minerva. Would you be volunteering as mentor, by any chance?”

Identical choking sounds came from both herself and Severus Snape.

“I am not a child! I hardly require…”

“Albus! You know how busy I am already…”

They both tailed off, looking at the beaming countenance of the headmaster. “Now then, really! Minerva, you appear to be the only member of staff with these concerns. Unless of course, anyone else would like to express their poor opinion of my taste?” Dead silence from the floor. One or two people shook their heads, and others tried to look as if they didn’t even know what muttering was. “And Severus, my boy” said Dumbledore, meaningfully, “a deal is a deal”.

Whatever Severus Snape had been about to say died on his lips. With both of them speechless, Dumbledore concluded triumphantly, “I will have a little chat with the two of you after the meeting concludes. Don’t worry”, he added with a twinkle. “A good compromise always leaves both parties feeling hard done by”.

It was a measure of her own mortification that Minerva didn’t even entertain the notion of hurling her glass at his head. Snape- Professor Snape, she mentally corrected- looked similarly chagrined.

And it was not until the new school year was several weeks advanced that Minerva McGonagall thought to wonder just what deal it was that Albus had mentioned.

drabble

2005-01-31T19:18:00.000+08:00

That little story we were discussing is half done. I must admit that Minerva McGonagall appears to have taken it over somewhat; but then, she has had the most to say!

hello

2005-01-29T21:28:00.000+08:00

Hello indeedy! Hmmm, am joining the world of bloggers...

Wah-hey!

2005-01-26T22:59:00.000+08:00

New blog for us to communicate! I know we discussed it so I decided to experiment.